Michael Singer's assertion that "the greatest practice is to relax behind every experience" invites us to reconsider our relationship with the myriad events that shape our lives. In a world often characterized by stress and urgency, this perspective offers a profound shift: rather than becoming entangled in our experiences, we can cultivate a state of relaxation that allows us to witness life with clarity and ease. This teaching matters deeply, as it encourages us to step back from the chaos of our thoughts and emotions, fostering a sense of inner peace that transcends the fluctuations of daily existence.
To relax behind every experience is not merely to adopt a passive stance; it is an active engagement with the present moment, a conscious choice to observe rather than react. This practice invites us to embrace the fullness of our experiences—both joyful and painful—without becoming overwhelmed by them. By doing so, we create a spaciousness within ourselves that allows for deeper understanding and acceptance, ultimately leading to a more harmonious way of being in the world.
The image / the metaphor
At the heart of Singer's quote lies a rich imagery of relaxation as a foundational practice. The verb "relax" suggests a softening, a letting go of tension that often accompanies our experiences. To "relax behind" implies a position of observation, as if we are stepping back from the stage of life to witness the unfolding drama without becoming enmeshed in it. This metaphor evokes a sense of detachment that is not cold or indifferent but rather a warm embrace of the present moment, allowing us to experience life fully while remaining anchored in our inner stillness.
Diving deeper into this metaphor, we can envision relaxation as a gentle river flowing behind the tumultuous waves of our experiences. While the waves may crash and swell, the river remains steady, providing a constant source of support and nourishment. This image encourages us to cultivate a sense of inner calm that can withstand the storms of life, reminding us that our true essence is not defined by the ups and downs of our experiences but by the unchanging presence that observes them.
In the speaker's tradition
Michael Singer's teachings are deeply rooted in the non-dual tradition, which emphasizes the interconnectedness of all existence and the illusion of separation. Concepts such as *sunyata* (emptiness) and *kenosis* (self-emptying) resonate with the idea of relaxing behind experiences. In this context, relaxation becomes a pathway to realizing our true nature, which is not bound by the transient nature of thoughts and emotions but is instead a vast expanse of awareness that embraces all experiences without attachment.
In *The Untethered Soul*, Singer draws upon the wisdom of various spiritual traditions, echoing the sentiments found in texts like the *Bhagavad Gita*, where the practice of detachment is celebrated as a means to achieve inner peace. The Gita teaches that by performing our duties without attachment to the fruits of our actions, we can cultivate a state of equanimity. This aligns beautifully with Singer's call to relax behind every experience, suggesting that true freedom arises when we release our grip on outcomes and allow life to unfold as it will.
Living the teaching
Consider a modern scenario where this teaching can be applied: imagine navigating a challenging work environment filled with deadlines and interpersonal conflicts. In such a setting, the instinct may be to react defensively or to become consumed by stress. However, by practicing relaxation behind these experiences, one can cultivate a sense of calm that allows for clearer thinking and more compassionate interactions. This approach transforms the workplace from a battleground into a space for collaboration and growth, where challenges are met with grace rather than resistance.
Another application of this teaching can be found in personal relationships, particularly during moments of conflict. When disagreements arise, the tendency is often to become entrenched in our positions, leading to escalation and hurt feelings. By choosing to relax behind the experience of conflict, we create an opportunity to listen deeply and respond with empathy. This shift not only diffuses tension but also fosters a deeper connection, allowing both parties to feel seen and understood, ultimately enriching the relationship.
A reflection
As we contemplate Michael Singer's profound insight, we are invited to reflect on our own experiences: how often do we find ourselves entangled in the emotional currents of life? What would it mean to relax behind these experiences, to observe them with a sense of detachment and acceptance? In this moment of reflection, consider this contemplative question: What would shift in your life if you approached each experience with a sense of relaxation and openness, allowing yourself to simply be present without judgment or expectation?


