The Paradox of Resistance: Embracing What We Fear
Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj's profound assertion, "What you resist not only persists, but will grow. What you hate you make stronger," invites us to reconsider our relationship with discomfort and aversion. This statement serves as a poignant reminder that the very act of resisting our fears or negative emotions often amplifies their presence in our lives. By clinging to our aversions, we inadvertently empower them, creating a cycle of suffering that can feel inescapable. Understanding this dynamic is crucial for anyone seeking a path toward inner peace and liberation.
At the heart of this teaching lies a fundamental truth about the nature of existence: what we resist is often a reflection of our own inner turmoil. The struggle against our fears and dislikes can lead to a deepening of those very experiences, trapping us in a cycle of conflict. To truly embrace the wisdom of Maharaj's words, we must cultivate a willingness to surrender—to let go of our need to control or reject what we perceive as negative. This act of surrender is not a passive resignation but an active engagement with the present moment, allowing us to transform our relationship with discomfort into one of acceptance and understanding.
The image / the metaphor
The imagery in Maharaj's quote evokes a vivid sense of struggle and growth. The verbs "resist" and "hate" carry a weight that suggests a battle, a confrontation with forces that seem external yet are deeply rooted within us. When we resist, we create a wall that not only blocks our progress but also fortifies the very thing we wish to escape. The metaphor of growth implies that our aversions, when nurtured by our resistance, can flourish in ways we might not anticipate, becoming more entrenched and powerful over time.
Diving deeper into this metaphor, we can see how resistance acts like a gardener who inadvertently waters the weeds instead of the flowers. The more we focus on what we dislike, the more energy we give it, allowing it to thrive in our consciousness. This dynamic reveals a profound truth about the nature of our thoughts and emotions: they are not static entities but living aspects of our experience that respond to our attention. By shifting our focus from resistance to acceptance, we can begin to cultivate a different kind of growth—one that fosters healing and transformation rather than perpetuating suffering.
In the speaker's tradition
Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj's teachings are deeply rooted in the non-dual tradition, which emphasizes the interconnectedness of all existence and the illusion of separation. Concepts such as *sunyata* (emptiness) and *kenosis* (self-emptying) resonate with the essence of his message. In recognizing that our resistance stems from a false sense of self, we can begin to dissolve the boundaries that create our suffering. This understanding aligns with the notion of *prajna*, or wisdom, which invites us to see beyond the dualities of like and dislike, acceptance and rejection.
A relevant text that echoes this sentiment is the *Upanishads*, which teach that the ultimate reality transcends our personal attachments and aversions. In the *Bhagavad Gita*, Krishna advises Arjuna to act without attachment to the fruits of his actions, illustrating the importance of surrendering to the flow of life. This wisdom encourages us to engage with our experiences fully, without the burden of resistance, allowing us to discover the deeper truths that lie beneath our surface-level emotions.
Living the teaching
Consider a modern scenario where this teaching can be applied: a person grappling with anxiety about public speaking. The more they resist their fear, the more it seems to grow, creating a cycle of avoidance that only intensifies their anxiety. By acknowledging their fear without judgment and allowing it to exist without resistance, they can begin to transform their relationship with it. This shift from resistance to acceptance opens the door to a more authentic experience, where they can engage with their fear as a natural part of their journey rather than an enemy to be vanquished.
In the context of relationships, this teaching can also illuminate the dynamics of conflict. When two individuals resist each other's perspectives, the tension escalates, often leading to misunderstandings and resentment. However, by practicing acceptance and surrendering the need to be right, both parties can create space for empathy and understanding. This approach not only diffuses the immediate conflict but also fosters a deeper connection, allowing love and compassion to flourish in the midst of disagreement.
A reflection
As we contemplate the wisdom of Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj, we are invited to reflect on our own lives: What are the fears or aversions that we resist, and how might they be growing stronger as a result? In what ways can we practice surrendering to these experiences, allowing them to exist without the weight of our judgment? By exploring these questions, we can begin to unravel the patterns of resistance that bind us, opening ourselves to a more profound sense of peace and acceptance.


